Last 3 Hours
Is Properbly The Most Epic Time In My Life.
Mixed Feelings With Mixed Ideas And Things Popping Up To My Brain.
The Only Thing I Can Do Is To Wait.
Or Let God Decide.
Which He Used To Play With Me.
Or Is He Not Playing With Me ?
Are What I Felt True ?
Did I Get The Wrong Idea ?
Did I Do The Wrong Thing ?
Wonder Why Im Here For ?
Someone Enlighten Me...
Im Giving Up Hope In Life.
Im Giving Up Hope In Trust.
Im Giving Up Hope In Friends.
Im Giving Up HOPE IN TRUST.
Im Giving Up Hope That Whatever God Does, It Meant Good.
Im Giving Up Hope In Feelings.
Im Giving Up Hope In Relationship.
Im Giving Up Hope In Games.
Im Giving Up Hope In Studies.
But Not Giving Up Hope In Money.
No One Can Fully Understand Me.
I Doubt So.
During These Last 3 Hours.
I Thought Of Lots Of Things...
Lots And Lots Of Things.
Even Thought Of Dieing.
Even Thought Of Lots Of Things...
Wonder What God Made Me For ?
To Suffer In Everything ?
No One Asks...
I Got A Realli Strong Feeling...
A Realli Strong Strong Feeling...
Someone Betrayed Me Again...
I Hope This Is Not True...
People Say Family Knows You Best.
Outsider Knows Me.
I Feel Like Typing Out My Entire Life's Story In Brief.
But I Cant Carry On...
I Never Failed Anything I Want It To Happen.
I Never Failed Anything That I Made It Happen.
Life's Crumbing Down...
If I Have A Sad Ending...
I Will Not Trust God Anymore.
Nothing Will.
People's Trust Is Worst.
THIS IS FUCKING SINGAPORE.
It's A Dog Eat Dog Town.
Few Days Ago.
I Looked At What I Have Done.
Why Have I Ended Up In Ite ?
I See The People Here.
I See The Work Here.
I Would Rather Go Back To Study.
I Fail To Grow Up...
Im Sorry.
I Should Have Done Right.
During Seconday 3.
I Do NOT REGRET Coming To Junyuan Secondary School.
I DO NOT REGRET GOING TO NORMAL ACADEMICS.
Against All Odds.
My Family - The People Who I Trust.
I Met Someone Realli Special.
Realli Realli Special.
That I Do Not Know How To Explain...
Last Weekend Sunday.
Melvin Talked Back About Our Old Primary School Life.
I Didnt Realise He Still Remembers The Primary 5 , 6.
Incident With Desmond Tan , Bonaventure.
I Looked Back Deeply.
Was It Worth Fighting With Them ?
Desmond Tan. - If We Didnt Fought That Time.
He Would Have Been My Closest Friend Till Now.
I Knew Desmond Since Kindergarden.
I Truely Regret. Just Because Of Me And Desmond.
Melvin Cried So Many Times.
AhNan Too.
Nan Kinda Protected Me Like A Personal Bodyguard.
It Was Very Sweet Of Him.
GengXuan Raged Many Times For Me.
Getting So Much Trouble For Me.
And I Sat Back Quietly.
When We Were Behind School.
Sometimes They Will Look For Us.
Ahnan Fought For Me...
While I Only Watching Behind.
Only Thinking Of A Gentleman Should Avoid Violence.
They Scolded Me Being "AhGua" Cause Of It.
It Became My Nickname For Primary 5,6.
Thats Why One Day.
When My Mum's Friends Say Im Like A AhGua.
I Wouldnt Do Anything.
Reflecting On Myself.
Am I One ?
Primary 6.
Graduated.
GengXuan Brought Me And AhNan To Fued Cafe.
For The Very First Time.
I Know There's Something Where People Gather And Play Games.
Lan Cafe.
What If I Didnt Go ?
Would I Still Be In Ite ? My Mum Asked
What If ?
I Didnt Say Hi To AhNan. During Primary 2 When I Saw AhNan
With His Family Below My House.
We Would Just Be Classmates Till Primary 4.
Secondary One.
Normal School Day.
Suddenly, A Girl Named Sinyee.
Banged My Table. Looking Down At Me.
Saying You Together With Ting Hui Arh ?
She's A Very Bad Person.
I Was Like Huh ? What ?
She Walked Away To Her Friends.
That Was The First 2 Sentences She Spoke To Me For The First Time.
Forget Say.
My Laziness Properbly Came During Secondary School .
I Felt That Normal Academic Was So Slacky.
And Was Already Out Of Tuition.
During Primary School. My Tuition Dates Were Like.
Monday Tuesday Thursday Friday Saturday.
Nearing To Primary 6. It Was Everyday.
How I Got Rid Of Them All ?
I Cheated My Parents.
I Didnt Went To EMS Tuitions And Went To Fued Cafe.
Fued Cafe ? ( The One Gx Introduced Me )
I Took The Cash For My Chinese Tuition.
250$ Per Month And Used To Treat AhNan To Pei Me Play During Tuition Hours.
My Mum Of Course Caught Me One Day.
I Didnt Have Any Tuitions After That.
So Link Back.
What If Geng Xuan Never Bring Me To Fued ?
But I Never Regret It.
Cause There's A Wonderful Person.
Anderson Tan Choo Kok.
He !!!
Knows Me Very Well.
More Well Then My Family.
More Well Then AhNan Currently.
He Truely Knows Me.
Btw.
Im Telling All These Brief Small Parts Of My Life
Its Because Its Links To Anything To Do Now.
Therefore Knowing Me Abit More ?
Secondary 2 ,4.
Singapore Youth Festival. ( Chinese Dance )
Big Part Of My Life.
I Didnt Know I Like Dancing ?
Izzit Because Im Near To Sinyee ?
Or Just Because I Like Everything About It.
Can Say Both ...
There's Lots Of Details For This...
Skipping Them.
I Realli Dun Feel Like Posting This Out.
But Since I Spent 40mins Typing This.
So Post Bah...
Coughing Badly....
